Part 1 - Everything You Need To Know About The Storyteller

It’s just gone 6pm on a Friday night, the end of my work week and this is going to be one week in my life. You might find me adversarial as I challenge your ethics and belief systems with my morals. Maybe what I say will discomfort you as it’s a little too close to your reality. Perhaps, I might not be your cup of tea, but if that is the case, now is the chance for you to peer through the looking glass.

You don’t know where I was born, where I live or even what generation I’m part of. You will get answers soon enough. But know this, demographics and statistics don’t make me who I am. You can’t read a report to know what annoys or frustrates me, makes me happy, sad, irritable or horny; this week will give you that insight.

Maybe you’re asking, am I too unremarkable to write about my life? I say, no way, everyone has a story to tell. I might not have lived an extraordinary life or done great or dastardly things, and yet my life is a story of triumphs and tears over four decades that straddles the start of the third millennium; I think that is reason enough to let you into my world.

Let’s get things kicked off . . . I’m a child of the eighties and a product of Thatcherism. I don’t get on with my mum and my sole sibling, my elder brother, is a non-entity. Both these heart-breaking realities can be…